I figured a lot of things out. I don’t do the whole trust thing very well. I have no new friends besides Dan. I have known him for 4 years. He was the last person that I have met that I can call friend. This is very disturbing to me.
I don’t know why I can’t make friends. I don’t know why I can’t meet women that I like. Many of them I despise. Many of them are pushed directly to friend status. (This simply means that they are there to help me hook up for the night…)
I guess what it all comes down to is how much I have changed over the years. I used to have a heart. Now I have a heart that is surrounded by ten layers of steel. It gets somewhat cold in there from time to time.
Maybe this is what growing up is supposed to be. Hah! I am almost 30 and I still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up! I still wonder if that is a sad thing.
